He always used to say it to me when I wanted to run before I could walk. It has always been so. Small steps. Take small steps. Small steps are sufficient. They will do. A chink of light. A new idea that she has embraced. A chance. A small thing but a nice thing, I think. It is a connection with minds that I respond to, to work that I respond to and the way they form their working spaces, those rooms of our own. Safe places where small challenging things happen. They are happy to invite me in, it seems. And I am touched. I want to do my best by them, by myself. To write well, whatever that is. And this other one who is to meet me tomorrow. A stranger who has let me in, who is open and kind. Young. Fresh. With the world ahead of her. I want to contain it though. I need this time alone, at home, to heal, to recover so the steps out there are small. But they will do. They will do.
Meanwhile she breathes somewhere else, far away with her two young things. My love.